


Everybody's Lonely

by sundaymournin



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Minor Character Death, brief mention of sex stuff, no one dies in it, or just like dead, sara the oc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-02-24
Packaged: 2019-03-23 05:37:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13780842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sundaymournin/pseuds/sundaymournin
Summary: “I think you came tonight because you do want to fall in love.” Even told him finally. “I think you came tonight because you do want to meet someone new.”Isak looked up, swallowing thickly. “Love? Come on.”“You don’t think we’re going to fall in love?” Even grinned, flicking his eyebrows up in a way that made Isak’s stomach clench. “We’re totally falling in love.”“Jesus, you’re a dork.” Isak looked away, trying to hide his smile.OR I felt like doing something sweet.





	Everybody's Lonely

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Victory4](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Victory4/gifts).



> if ya’ll don’t listen to everybody’s lonely by jukebox the ghost before reading this, you will not get the full experience so it’s a law you have to do it sorry i dont make the rules (except i do - go listen)

_ “why’s every song about love? _

_ or drinking too much? _

_ yeah, maybe that’s because everybody’s lonely” _

 

* * *

 

 

Isak hated Jonas.

 

Okay, no. He didn’t, but he did. Just a little. 

 

For the past three years, his ever-loyal best friend had been setting him up on blind dates. For the past three years, every single one of them would go perfectly, Isak would fall head over heels for the guy, they’d be together for a year, and then he would get dumped. Like fucking clockwork. First with Julian, then Nils, then Adrian.

 

_ Adrian.  _

 

Isak shoulders slumped just at the name alone. It still burned, deep in his chest. He knew why; too quiet, too boring, too clingy. Isak had found, through his lovely failed relationships, that he was a homebody. If there was something in his life that made it feel worthwhile, he didn’t need to go out. He didn’t need to party. He didn’t need to do anything but lay in bed with them and watch Netflix. 

 

Adrian had hated that. He’d wanted adventure, he wanted excitement. He wanted to do things and experience things and Isak? He wanted to cuddle and sleep and hide his face in Adrian’s neck. Isak wanted…

 

_ Fuck, _ he didn’t even know what. To be happy, he supposed. 

 

But that was just too bad, right? Adrian had dumped him. It had been six months and Jonas had set him up on another date, probably with a perfect guy like he usually did. Probably with someone wonderful who would make Isak laugh and smile and want to kiss. Probably with someone who would make him feel special and make him happy. Someone who would be able to tape up his heart and make him forget about Adrian. 

 

Someone who, Isak knew, would dump him eventually because every single one of them did. 

 

He knew Jonas probably picked a perfect guy, because he knew Isak so well, but that didn’t matter. He wasn’t going to do it again. He wasn’t going to let down his guard. He wasn’t going to fall in love. He wasn’t going to do it. He wasn’t. 

 

And then  _ he _ sat down. 

 

“Halla.” 

 

Isak blinked, mouth falling open. The guy, the new guy, was gorgeous. He was tall — taller than Isak, even, and his smile was blinding. Isak couldn’t see his eyes because they were nearly closed with how wide his grin was, but he was sure they were beautiful. He was sure every inch of this guy was fucking perfect. 

 

“Hi.” He finally croaked out. 

 

Isak wasn’t going to do it. 

 

“I’m Even.” The guy told him, sitting down and leaning forward with his elbows on the table. “Isak, right?”

 

“Uh, yeah.” 

 

The smile got impossibly bigger.  _ Jesus. _ “Jonas told me about you. I’m excited.” 

 

Isak leaned back in his seat, mostly just to catch his breath. He needed distance to think, to remind himself of his goal. To remember he wasn’t fucking doing this again. He  _ wasn’t. _ “Oh? He didn’t tell me about you.”

 

“Nei?” Even didn’t seem phased. 

 

“Nei.” Isak shrugged. “He never tells me about the guys.” 

 

Even raised his eyebrows. That threw him off. “Guys?” 

 

Isak nodded. “He sets me up.” 

 

“Often?” The smile disappeared, replaced by an expression that looked almost nervous. Almost scared. 

 

Isak wanted the smile back. “Nei, just… Just sometimes.” 

 

Even hummed. “And how do they usually go?”

 

It was the way he said it, the way his head turned and he grinned. It was adorable and Isak immediately wanted to lean in and capture his lips in a kiss. He wanted to pull his hair, he wanted to forget his own name — Since Adrian’s had been forgotten the second Even sat down. He wanted more. He always wanted more.

 

But not this time.

 

No. 

 

“They usually date me for a year and then get bored.” Isak told him, summoning all of the coldness he once had. When he was a teenager, he’d been perfect at playing that game. The aloof game. The ‘I don’t care’ game. It had melted away over time, but he could bring it back just as quickly. It was like muscle memory.

 

Especially when he thought of how much it would hurt if Even broke up with him. If they fell in love and Isak got to sleep on his chest and feel what it was like to kiss him and hold him. Especially if he knew what it felt like to get familiar with that smile, to get to wake up to it every day, to get to feel it against his neck and thighs and —

 

Isak knew. He knew it would be stolen from him; Even would find something wrong with him and he’d get bored and Isak would be left feeling broken. He’d be left all alone and he couldn’t do that. Not anymore. He couldn’t handle one more crack in his stupid, fragile heart. 

 

Even would shatter him. 

 

“How could anyone get bored of you?”

 

Isak rolled his eyes, flushing. “Shut up.” 

 

“I’m serious.” Even insisted, cocking his head to the side. “I don’t think I’d ever get bored of you.” 

 

“You say that now, but—“ 

 

“Can I help you two?” The waitress came up to the table, interrupting them. She was smiley and perky and seemed to find Even just as beautiful as he did. Her name was Sara and she talked fast and took their orders quickly and left Isak feeling a little pathetic. Even had smiled at her too, had been nice to her too. 

 

Isak had been imaging a whole life, a whole story, but that didn’t matter because Even would probably end up cheating on him with their waitress eventually. That’s the kind of painful irony he got in life, right? 

 

_ God,  _ maybe that’s why everyone dumped him. He’d practically fallen in love with Even the second he saw his face. Isak was a stupid romantic and people got bored with romantics. 

 

“You’re overthinking.” Even told him, warm. 

 

“You don’t know that.” Isak mumbled, avoiding his gaze.

 

Even hummed, pressing their knees together under the table. “It’s all over your face.” He told him. “Jonas told me you got out of a break up awhile ago. I get it if you’re not ready to move on.”

 

Isak sighed. “I’m fine. It’s the… I don’t want to date ever again.”

 

“Then why did you come tonight?”

 

“I don’t  _ know.” _ Isak groaned, trying to pull his knees away. They were both too tall and he just ended up banging them together again. 

 

Even stayed quiet for a few minutes. Isak wondered if he was going to just get up and leave. If he was going to tell Isak he was a dick for getting his hopes up and walk away. If he was going to tell Jonas what an asshole he’d been. It hurt, but Isak would take this hurt over a breakup a year down the line. 

 

“I think you came tonight because you  _ do _ want to fall in love.” Even told him finally. “I think you came tonight because you  _ do _ want to meet someone new.”

 

Isak looked up, swallowing thickly. “Love? Come on.”

 

“You don’t think we’re going to fall in love?” Even grinned, flicking his eyebrows up in a way that made Isak’s stomach clench. “We’re  _ totally  _ falling in love.”

 

“Jesus, you’re a dork.” Isak looked away, trying to hide his smile. 

 

“You’ll see, Isak.” Even’s smile faded into something more sincere. “I won’t hurt you.”

 

* * *

 

 

That was a total lie. Even did hurt him.

 

He hurt him when he talked about movies; Even’s eyes lit up and his hands moved wildly as he spoke about how  _ important  _ Romeo + Juliet was to cinema. He hurt Isak when he laughed, head cocking to the side and eyes fond. He hurt Isak when he talked about his best friend, an ever-present, fond grin on his face. 

 

Even was so  _ fucking  _ sweet and Isak was only human.

 

“What do you like to do for fun?” Even asked him.

 

Isak shrugged. 

 

“Are you into music?”

 

Isak shrugged.

 

“What are you studying?”

 

Isak shrugged. 

 

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to answer, he had to force himself not to. If he engaged, Isak would fall. Hard, fast. Break-your-ankles kind of fall. So, he kept his mouth shut and picked at his food while Even did the talking. Until —

 

“I have an idea.” Even mumbled, pulling out his phone. 

 

“Hm?”

 

Even smiled. “36 Questions.”

 

“Okay?” Isak frowned. “I don’t want to do that.”

 

“Why not?” Even asked, still smiling. Always smiling. Did this dude ever get sad?

 

“Because it’s to make you fall in love.” Isak pointed out, sinking into his seat a little.

 

Even raised his eyebrows, comically. “Exactly.” He looked back down at his phone. “Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?” 

 

“Even!” Isak groaned. 

 

“I’m already here.” Even grinned. 

 

“No, I mean — I’m not doing this.” Isak insisted. 

 

Even sighed. “At least give me a chance? Please?” 

 

And then he  _ pouted _ and that was just obscene. Isak was a human being, he couldn’t deny Even a goddamn thing when he looked like that. 

 

“My mom.” Isak blurted. 

 

_ Whoa.  _ Honest. Really honest. Stupidly honest.

 

Even blinked at him before nodding and handing Isak the phone. “Mines Baz Luhrmann.” 

 

“The director of that one movie?” Isak made a face.

 

“So you were listening.” Even grinned. “Ask the next question.” 

 

Isak’s eyes flitted over his handsome face for a long moment before he sighed and read the question: “Would you like to be famous? In what way?”

 

Even hummed. “I would. I’d like be famous for directing.” He explained. “Or maybe if I’d painted something. I like all sorts of art, but I’d prefer to be known for directing. You?”

 

Isak shook his head. “I don’t want to be famous at all.”

 

“No?”

 

“No.”

 

Even leaned in. “Would you date a famous person?”

 

Isak bit the inside of his cheek. “That’s not the question.” He mumbled, handing the phone back. 

 

They went on for awhile and it was fine, it was normal. Isak hid a laugh and a flush behind his hands, Even continued being charming. But then the questions got harder. They got… more. 

 

“What is your most treasured memory?” Even asked, putting down the phone.

 

Isak tensed. He knew the memory, he knew the exact moment in time that meant the most to him. And as much as he liked Even, as smitten as he was, he wasn’t ready for that. He’d barely scraped the surface of that with Adrian. “I think I gotta get home.” 

 

“Wait, what?” Even frowned, standing up as Isak did. “We don’t have to play anymore if you don’t want.”

 

“I just need to get home. It’s late. I have a class tomorrow.” Isak mumbled, ducking his head and refusing to meet Even’s eye. He knew he was being cowardly — and probably really rude — but he said he wasn’t going to do it, so he wasn’t. 

 

“Isak.”

 

“Bye!”

 

* * *

 

 

Isak was only two blocks away when his phone started vibrating in his pocket. He sighed, tugging of his glove at pulled it out. “What, Jonas?”

 

_ “Go back.” _

 

“Jonas, no.” Isak shook his head. 

 

_ “He’s a good dude. He’s nice. He likes you. Just stop thinking so much and go back.”  _

 

Isak stopped and leaned against a wall. “I can't do it again.” 

 

_ “Don’t be dramatic.” _

 

“I’m serious!”

 

_ “Isak.”  _ Jonas sighed on the other end of the phone.  _ “He’s perfect for you. He’s smart, he’s funny, he’s sweet. He’s been through some pretty rough shit too.” _

 

“Like what?”

 

_ “Go back and find out. I’m serious. I won’t talk to you for two months if you don’t.” _

 

Isak scoffed. “Two? Come on!”

 

_ “Bye, Isak!” _

 

So, he went back. Even was standing outside of the restaurant, head bowed and looking sad. He was smoking a cigarette, hand trembling a little. 

 

“You’re still here.” Isak mumbled, surprised. 

 

Even looked up, dropping the cigarette and stomping it out. “Uh, yeah.” 

 

Unlike before, his smile wasn’t blinding. It was still handsome, still irresistible, but hesitant. It was scared. It was the smile of someone who felt rejected and maybe judged and a little bad about themselves. It was a smile of someone who, as Jonas had said, had been through some shit too. 

 

“My most treasured memory is my mom taking me to see the Northern Lights when I was ten.” Isak told him, a lump rising in his throat. “It was before she… She went off her meds and things got crazy.”

 

“Crazy?” Even echoed, uncertain.

 

Isak met his gaze, wincing. “I mean, hectic.”

 

“... Mine is meeting Steven Spielberg in an airport.” Even admitted softly. 

 

“You  _ met _ him?” Isak gasped.

 

Even grinned and Isak found himself melting again. “I can tell you about it over a beer?”

 

Isak bit his lip. “Sounds good.”

 

* * *

 

 

It took Isak two beers. Two beers and a lot of Even’s face for him to lean in, let their knees touch, cock his head to the side and grin. “Why do you think Jonas wanted us to meet?” He asked.

 

His best friend was perfect; Jonas always chose the most perfect guys. Guys that Isak always fell for instantly, guys who usually liked him too. Guys who thought he was attractive and smart and funny. Guys who were the stuff from Isak’s damn dreams. 

 

Isak didn’t know how he found them, but he did. 

 

“I asked him about you.” Even admitted, taking a sip from his water. He’d had one beer and stopped. Isak had noticed, but had decided against saying anything. “I’ve seen you around school.”

 

“You have?” Isak asked, cheeks going pink. 

 

Even nodded, glancing away like he was embarrassed. “Well, with your ex and then… On your own. Figured I’d ask—“

 

“You has a crush on  _ me?” _ Isak gasped, grabbing a fistful of Even’s shirt to keep his balance when someone bumped into him from behind. “Me?”

 

Even chuckled, placing a hand on his waist and Isak would let him keep it there for the rest of his life if he wanted. “Of course I did.”

 

Isak blinked a couple times, shaking his head. “Have you seen yourself?”

 

“What does that mean?”

 

“You’re gorgeous.” Isak told him, like it was obvious. “You’re the prettiest person—“ 

 

He caught himself off by slapping a hand over his stupid, half-drunken mouth. He had been trying not to completely fall for Even, to hold back a little, but the alcohol loosened his tongue. 

 

“The prettiest person?” Even grinned, looking positively pleased with himself. He squeezed Isak’s hip, pulling him closer. “You think I’m gorgeous  _ and  _ pretty?”

 

Isak rolled his eyes. “As if you don’t know.”

 

Even threw his head back and laughed, shoulders shaking and eyes disappearing and neck fully exposed in the most sinful way. Isak couldn’t help but lean forward and pressing his face into the crook of his neck, inhaling. Even’s breath hitched, his grip on Isak’s hip tightening in an almost painful way. 

 

_ “Isak.” _

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You smell good.” Even whispered into his hairline, hand sliding from his hip, up his side before fisting in Isak’s hair.

 

Isak whined. “I’m so drunk.”

 

Even froze, breathing against Isak’s ear. “Want me to take you home?”

 

“Mhm.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Eskild!” Isak whined, banging not the door to his flat. He’d evidently forgotten his keys, like an idiot, and no one was answering their phone. “Linn!” 

 

Even stood next to him, leaning against he wall with an amused smile on his lips. Like he thought Isak’s annoyance was adorable. Like he thought Isak’s shouting at 01:33 was endearing. 

 

Suddenly the door swung open and Eskild stood there, shirtless and in his boxers. “Honestly, baby gay, again?”

 

“Oh, you forget all the time.” Isak muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

 

“Are you drunk?” Eskild asked, surprised.

 

Isak rolled his eyes. “Barely.” He grabbed Even’s wrist and dragged him inside, pushing past Eskild. 

 

“Wait, who’s—“

 

“Bye, Eskild!”

 

“Is this the—“

 

_ “Bye, _ Eskild!”

 

Isak pulled them into his room and slammed the door shut behind him. The room wasn’t the dirtiest it had ever been, but it wasn’t clean either. He had clothes all over the floor, his gaming controllers tangled on the floor, his books spread out on the bed. And it probably didn’t smell good. 

 

He rushed to the bedside table, trying to unwrap a scent thing that Eskild had given him. “I— I don’t usually have people in here.” Isak mumbled, blushing brightly as he struggled with the plastic.

 

Even took it from his hands and opened it easily. “My rooms an absolute disaster in comparison. I have way too much shit.” 

 

Isak nodded, plugging the thing into the wall. “I don’t have enough, I think.”

 

They stood in an uncomfortable silence for a moment before speaking at once.

 

“So, what music do you like?”

 

“I don’t fuck on the first date.” 

 

Isaks mouth dropped open in surprise. “Wait, what?”

 

Even was blushing then. “Oh, I thought—“

 

“I’m not—“ Isak bit the inside of his cheek. “I’m not like that.”

 

“Like what?” 

 

Isak winced. “I don’t know.”

 

“Are you slut-shaming?” Even teased, his pretty smile back. 

 

“Oh, fuck off.” Isak grumbled, clearing his things from his bed. “You can go, if you want.” 

 

“Is there any invitation to stay?” Even asked, eyebrows raising when Isak turned back to face him. “Sans sex?”

 

Isak sat back on his bed, biting back his own smile. “Maybe.”

 

“Maybe.” Even echoed, sitting down next to him. “I had a good time tonight.”

 

Isak smiled up at him, head cocking to the side. “Yeah…  _ Oh!”  _ He jumped up from the bed, and grabbed a makeshift bong he had under his bed. “Do you wanna?”

 

Even gave the contraption a doubtful look. “With that?”

 

“What?”

 

“Does it work?” Even asked, squinting.

 

Isak frowned. “Uh,  _ yeah. _ I made it.” He told the other man, as if it was obvious, because it should’ve been. Isak didn’t make things that didn’t work. 

 

“I just usually roll.” Even explained. 

 

“I don’t have papers.” 

 

“I do.” Even shrugged.

 

That’s how they ended up laying back on the bed with the window open and smoking two joints. They were both on their sides, facing one another with their hands lingering between them. Isak was aching to touch, but didn’t dare. He didn’t know why, either. 

 

Even liked him, he liked Even. At this point, Isak had accepted that. He’d barely thought of Adrian all night and Jonas had told him to try. He was trying, but still. He held back. He was always holding back. 

 

“Do you believe it?” Isak whispered.

 

“Believe what?” Even hummed. 

 

“What you said earlier.”

 

Even raised his eyebrows. “I said a lot earlier.”

 

Isak laughed, shoving his shoulder. “Fuck  _ off. _ ”

 

“What part?” Even laughed, too. “About what?”

 

“That we’ll fall in love.” Isak asked, biting his lip and searching Even’s eyes for a lie. For a reason not to. 

 

Even smiled fondly, reaching over to gently push a curl behind Isak’s ear. “Absolutely.”

 

* * *

 

 

Two weeks later, Eskild had cornered Even in the kitchen with a kind smile but cold eyes. “If you hurt him, at all, I will break your handsome face. He is the best person I’ve met, and I swear—“

 

“God dammit, Eskild!” Isak had groaned when he found them.

 

Even and Eskild wrote up a contract and it was signed. Isak thought it was very dramatic but he loved every second of it.

 

* * *

 

 

The next month, Isak was being pressed into Jonas’ bed with Even’s mouth wrapped around him. They were at a party for someone, Isak couldn’t remember who at that point. He had his hands shoved in the man’s hair and had been moaning when Jonas had found them. 

 

“I regret this already.” He had groaned, hiding his face in Eva’s shoulder. 

 

* * *

 

 

Four months down the line and Isak was blushing while he met Even’s parents. He’d warn a scarf to try to hide all the marks his boyfriend had made on his neck, but it hadn’t helped. Even’s father high fived his son and Isak overheard his mother whispering:

 

“He really loves you, Even.”

 

“Yeah, I know, Mom.”

 

“Be good to him.”

 

Even had gasped. “Aren’t you supposed to be on my side? Threatening him?”

 

“Have you seen that face? He couldn’t hurt a fly.”

 

* * *

 

 

Seven months into it, on the anniversary of Isak’s mom’s death, Even had been manic. They broke up for a full six hours before they met one another halfway to the others flat.

 

“I was coming to—“

 

“Me too.”

 

“Please, Isak, I—“

 

“I know, me too. I’m—“

 

“So sorry and—“

 

“God, Even, I love you.”

 

“Please don’t leave me.”

 

“Please don’t leave me.”

 

* * *

 

 

Around a year in, Isak started to get on edge. He watched Even with careful eyes, he never argued with him, they did whatever Even wanted or whatever Isak thought he’d like constantly. Isak was tiptoeing, trying to be the best boyfriend possible. 

 

“Babe.” Even frowned one day when Isak changed his shirt because Even thought he was going to wear a different one. “Isak.”

 

“Yeah?” Isak asked.

 

“... I’m not going to break up with you.” Even told him slowly, pulling him in and kissing him slowly. He bit Isak’s lower lip, fucking his mouth with his tongue until his boyfriend was a whining mess in his arms. “I’m in love you. Okay? I’m so in love with you.”

 

Isak cried into his shirt the entire night, arms locked around him. 

 

* * *

 

 

Five years in and Isak threw an empty milk carton at Even’s head because he didn’t buy more, then apologized for a full thirty minutes while Even tried to stop laughing. 

 

“Why are you always so grumpy?” Even grinned.

 

Isak pouted. “Fuck you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Jonas didn’t set Isak up ever again.

**Author's Note:**

> heyyyy so i know this isn't the best thing i've ever written, but i had fun writing it. it's based on a gif i posted on my twitter (@sungaymournin). i'll be updating empty home very soon, guys, i'm so sorry i'm trash. hit me up on twitter or tumblr (sundaymournin) and we can chat if ya'll want. lmk what you think in the comments because that's always great encouragement and maybe it'll kick my ass into gear. have a good fredag! x 
> 
> x zee


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